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How to Message on Tinder
  • Blog

How to Message on Tinder — The Most Important Rules

  • Nina Bitkoska
  • June 17, 2022

Dating apps can be very intimidating yet they’ve become a leading communication tool for single people. We’ve all been asking ourselves: how to start a conversation on a dating app? Tinder is one of the most famous apps, with millions of users worldwide, meaning there’s no shortage of prospective matches!

Thinking about how many awkward conversations you’ve had on Tinder can make you anxious to start chatting with a potential love interest. Furthermore, it can be hard to figure out how to start a convo, especially with someone you find attractive.

If you’re worried you’ll say the wrong things, use our tips to have successful conversations on Tinder that will result in dates.

How to Message on Tinder — Basic Rules

Of course, first impressions are important in any situation, especially when a possible relationship is at stake. So be thoughtful and unique in your Tinder opener to make that first impression count, but don’t rely on cheesy pickup lines. The simplest and best way to start a convo on Tinder is to use the information their profile gives you.

Since the app was launched, there have been 55 billion matches, and if you want to be one of those, you need to up your game.

Have a Nice Look at Their Profile

What we mean is: inspect their profile thoroughly. Check your match’s pictures and bio to grasp what kind of person they are.

Then, you should look for something you can use as a starting point for your chat. For example, you can start a convo based on their interests mentioned in the profile. Or maybe you’ll find that you both have similar interests, and you can go from there.

Who Messages First?

On Tinder, anyone can message first, although some women prefer to wait for the man to contact them. If you’re swiping and matching, you can send your first message immediately. It’s also acceptable to wait a few hours or days.

The best way to start a conversation on Tinder is with lighthearted, down-to-earth, short pickup lines. And you should always end with a particular question.

Use Correct Grammar

Everyone gets turned off by bad grammar and incoherent texts. So don’t get lazy and reread the messages before you send them. You should know that bad grammar screams bad intellect.

Have a Purpose

You need to know your next step. It’s a bad idea to text for days without a specific goal in mind. Your end goal is to meet and have a date, so you should avoid pointless texts.

However, doing a quick online background check on them is strongly recommended before you meet.

Be Honest

You don’t want your first message on Tinder to be a lie. So don’t say you’re into something just to sound cool. And don’t act like someone you’re not. Instead, try to show who you are.

Be honest, but make sure the other person is being honest, as well. You can protect yourself from online dating scams by not being too trusting.

Good Tinder Conversation Starters

Forget about starting with “hey, hi, hello.” Someone will be excited to hear the message notification, and all the person gets is “Hey.” It doesn’t show effort. Instead, they say “Hey,” back, and then you respond, “How are you doing,” making it the most boring conversation.

How to Start a Conversation on Tinder?

The goal of the first Tinder message is to get the other person excited to talk to you. Therefore, you need to start conversations in a way that has a chance of survival. That means asking open-ended questions to allow the other person to expand on the answer.

You can’t go wrong if you ask something specific that you’d noticed on their profile, whether it’s a photo of their pet or them on vacation. You can say nice things about the picture, but don’t start with the physical features. For instance, compliment them on what a fantastic photo it is and ask where they took the photo.

Ask Them About Their Origins

Asking where they’re from is one of the best Tinder conversation starters. Of course, you want to signal the other person that you’re interested, meaning you need to learn more about where they’re from and what their story is. Good location-based convo starters include:

  • How long have you lived in this town?
  • Where were you born?
  • What‘s your favorite place here?
  • A true Chicago native. Do you like jazz?

Make a Joke

Making a joke is one of the best ways to start a convo on Tinder. It’s so important to learn how to joke with one another.

So, include some humor right away. However, we all have a different sense of humor, so try making some jokes to see if you’re compatible. Everyone gets points for being amusing!

Also, you can send a funny GIF. Maybe you didn’t expect this — but you can’t go wrong with sending a GIF! Just ensure it’s appropriate for whatever message you’re trying to convey.

Research shows that texts that contain GIFs are 30% more likely to get a response. We recommend saying something about the GIF rather than just sending it. You want to start a conversation with the GIF, so be clear with your intention.

Flirt a Little

How to message on Tinder so you can flirt but still be appropriate? You can flirt even with general compliments; you don’t need to focus on physical ones. General compliments leave room for more open conversation. You can send something flirty even when you first start communicating.

Flirt subtly, but do it confidently to let the conversation take its natural course. Try something like: “I see you skied in France last winter. You must be quite the athlete.” Insert wink emoji and half of your flirtation is done.

Wrapping up

It’s not difficult to start a conversation on Tinder. A good first message on Tinder is something engaging that will catch the other person’s eye. Just ensure your message indicates that you have read the person’s profile and are eager to learn more about them.

Just avoid anything that the other person could perceive as creepy. Keep the conversation short, simple, honest, and entertaining, and you’ll connect with your match in no time!

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Nina Bitkoska

Before she started writing, Nina obtained a bachelor’s degree in English language and literature. Nina is a language aficionado with experience in writing and teaching, so she is always interested in learning more. Her articles are well-researched, intriguing, and captivating, thanks to her thirst for knowledge. Traveling and wandering around new places is a favorite activity of hers, while in her spare time, she loves to cycle by the lake, read books, and watch TV shows with a glass (or two) of wine.

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Table of Contents:
  1. How to Message on Tinder — Basic Rules
  2. Good Tinder Conversation Starters
  3. Wrapping up
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